Wednesday, February 27, 2019

Debut Albums and Young Man

A Talking Frog An older world was romping a round of golf. Suddenly his wrap sliced and get in a shallow pond. As he was attempting to retrieve the ball he disc overed a toad who, to his great surprise, started to speak candy kiss me, and I impart change into a beautiful princess, and I allow for be yours for a week. He picked up the frog and placed it in his pocket. As he continued to play golf, the frog repeated its message. fondle me, and I will change into a beautiful princess, and I will be yours for a self-colored month The man continued to play his golf game and once again the frog spoke out. pamper me,and I will change into a beautiful princess, and I will be yours for a whole year Finally, the old man dour to the frog and exclaimed, At my age, Id rather have a talking frog The Last Ticket During a busy holiday weekend, a char womanhood who was eight months pregnant went to the railway station to return home to her save. At the reservation counter, when her t urn came, there was only one ticket left.Taking gentleness on a very old lady behind her in line, she offered her berth to the old lady and sent a telegram to her husband which arrived with a small error Shall be coming tomorrow, heavy mint in the train, ave birth to an old lady. A Business Loan A man of affairs walked into a bank in San Francisco and asked for the loan policeman. He told the officer that he is going to Europe on business for two weeks and infallible to borrow $5,000. The bank officer explained that the bank require some mixed bag of security for such a loan. So the businessman handed over the keys to a Rolls Royce parking areaed on the street in front of the bank.Everything analyze out, and the bank agreed to accept the car as collateral for the loan. A bank employee drove the Rolls into the banks underground garage and parked it there. Two weeks later, the businessman returned, repaid the $5,000 with interest, which came to $15. 41. The loan officer said, We are very happy to have had your business, and this exercise has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. epoch you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is why would you b early(a) to borrow $5,000? The businessman replied, Where else in San Francisco can I park my car for two weeks for only 15 bucks? A Big end A six-year-old give-and-take walked up to his father one day and announced, Daddy, Id analogous to get married. His father replied hesitantly, Sure, son, do you have anyone special in headspring? Yes, answered the boy. l want to marry Grandma. Now, wait a minute, said his father. You dont take Id let you get married with my grow, do you? Why not? the boy asked. You married mine. c Penguins A truck driver was whimsical 100 penguins to the New York Zoo when his truck broke down on the motorway.The driver got out of the cab and was looking at the engine when a southward truck driver stopped in f ront of him and asked if he needed any help. The penguins driver explained that ne was taking the penguins to the zoo and asked f the other man would take the penguins there. He agreed. Some hours later, the second truck driver drove past the first one, who was still waiting on the freeway for help to come. The penguins, however, were still on the truck l thought I asked you to take those penguins to the zoo, shouted the first driver. The second replied, l did, but I had some money left, so were going to the cinema now. Supermarket Encounter A young man was walking through a supermarket to pick up a hardly a(prenominal) things when he noticed an old lady succeeding(a) him around. Thinking nothing of it, he ignored her and continued on. Finally, he went to the stoppage line, but she got in front of him. Pardon me, she said, Im sorry if my staring at you has made you feel uncomfortable. Its Just that you look Just like my son who Just died recently. Im very sorry, replied the youn g man, Is there anything I can do for you? Yes, she said. As Im leaving, can you say Goodbye mother? It would make me feel such(prenominal) better. Sure, answered the young man. As the old woman was leaving, he called out, Goodbye mother As he stepped up to the checkout counter, he saw that his chalk up was $127. 50. How can that be? he asked, l only purchased a few things Your mother said that you would pay for her, said the clerk. Do you deserve to come out heaven? A man died and went to heaven. An angel met him at the Gates of enlightenment and said, Before you meet with God, I thought I should tell you weve examined your whole life, and you really didnt do anything particularly good or bad. Were not sealed whether we can admit you into heaven or not.Can you tell us anything extraordinary you did that can help us make a decision? The newly arrived soul thought for a moment and replied, Yeah, once I was driving along and came upon a woman who was being harassed by a gro up of goons. So I pulled over, got out my tire iron, and went up to the draw of the gang. He was a big, muscular, hairy guy with tattoos all over his be and a ring pierced through his meander. Well, I tore the nose ring out of his nose, and told him that he and his gang had better stop bothering the woman or they would have to deal with me Im impressed, The angel responded, When did this happen? The man replied, closely two minutes ago. Return my cavalry A cowboy rode into township and stopped at a saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on strangers. When he finished his drink, he ound his clam had been stolen. He went back into the bar, handily flipped his gun into the air, caught it above his head without so far looking and fired a shot into the ceiling. Which one of you sidewinders stole my horse??? he yelled with surprising forcefulness. No one answered. Alright, Im gonna have another(prenominal) beer, and if my horse aint back outs ide by the time I finish, Im gonna do what I did in Texas

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